A very personal problem

[Speelgoedmannetje]

And what about those fish bones? :nervous:

[Karlos]

What about those bone... bones?

[Speelgoedmannetje]

Well, one can choke on it. :nervous:

[motorollin]

Karlos wrote:

Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
I doubt your b/f will have much trouble with you having a quick snack, as long as you come home for dinner.

Actually, unless homosexual relationships are emotionally quite different, I'd have thought that the hurt caused by having a bit of a fling would be just as bad as it is for heterosexual relationships :-?

Sorry Eyso, Karlos is right in this case. If I did anything like that without telling him it would be very hurtful for him. If we talked about it he might be able to come to terms with me "getting it out of my system", but I couldn't handle if it the tables were turned (and he told me he was tempted with somebody else), so I prefer not to even bring it up.

[Speelgoedmannetje]

Aren't you too uncertain about your relationship to make it depend on with whom you have sex with?

[motorollin]

Not uncertain. But we are faithful to each other.

[Speelgoedmannetje]

How can you be faithful if you can't bring up your feelings honestly?
What is faithful anyway? One can't force one another to not have such feelings. One can't do it even himself.

[the_leander]

Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
Well, one can choke on it. :nervous:

I think that's what he was getting at  :lol:

Nice play on words Karlos  :-D

[Speelgoedmannetje]

Well, 'twas a bit of 'gefundenes fressen'

[motorollin]

Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
How can you be faithful if you can't bring up your feelings honestly?

Well I think that the feelings I have been having for someone else are somewhat unfaithful as I should only have feelings for my bf.

Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
One can't force one another to not have such feelings. One can't do it even himself.

Yes you're right, but there's no point upsetting my bf by telling him.

[bloodline]

Well Moto, my only advice would be to talk to your boyfriend about it... I know that seems weird, but a bunch of Amiga geeks on the other side of the world are not going to be able to help you as much as someone you love and know really well. If he loves you then he will understand, and hopefully be happy that you were able to share your feeligns with him...

I was in a similar situation a year ago, my g/f said she was having feelings for a man she worked with, we spoke about it... but saddly she decided to stay with me and we've been miserable together ever since. :-D

[Speelgoedmannetje]

motorollin wrote:

Yes you're right, but there's no point upsetting my bf by telling him.

If you cannot upset your bf, you'll always have to 'walk on your toes' in your relationship. :-/

[motorollin]

Speelgoedmannetje wrote:

motorollin wrote:
Yes you're right, but there's no point upsetting my bf by telling him.

If you cannot upset your bf, you'll always have to 'walk on your toes' in your relationship. :-/

*Sigh*, yes you're right. I think it's time for a chat  :nervous:

[Speelgoedmannetje]

/me gives moto moral support
Surely you won't have to be affraid of your bf. He chose you :-)

[motorollin]

Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
/me gives moto moral support
Surely you won't have to be affraid of your bf. He chose you :-)

Thanks Eyso :-) You're right, he did choose me (and I accepted :-D ) I'm not afraid of him, only of hurting him. But you're right that I have to be honest with him about this. Think I'll leave it a few days though as our 5 year anniversary is coming up soon.

[cecilia]

motorollin wrote:

Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
How can you be faithful if you can't bring up your feelings honestly?

Well I think that the feelings I have been having for someone else are somewhat unfaithful as I should only have feelings for my bf.

oh, come now. don't be so hard on yourself.
what you are feeling is human. it's normal.

your feelings can't be hurtful to anyone. feelings are private. you are allowed to experience your feelings. never feel guilty about that.