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Author Topic: The current situation, conspiracy theories please  (Read 5717 times)

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Offline mikeymikeTopic starter

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The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« on: March 16, 2004, 11:59:53 PM »
Come on, let's skip past the crap where people claim to have an understanding of law wrt businesses.

The only entertainment in a situation like this are some really nicely cooked-up conspiracy theories.  Extra points for including historical figures and political connnections.

I'll throw in a few ideas that might get peoples' creative juices flowing:

* WMDs
* Al-Qaeda (however it is spelt today)
* George Bush
* Roswell
* CIA, MI5, etc
* Brown envelopes stuffed with money/t-shirts/MS software
* Smoking guns
* Grassy knolls
* Male models
* 42

 

Offline that_punk_guy

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #1 on: March 17, 2004, 12:01:42 AM »
I think mikeymike is trying to distract us... but from what?

;-)
 

Offline redrumloa

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2004, 12:06:30 AM »
@mikeymike

You forgot one.

I am using mind control over everyone, forcing them to part with all their money :lol:
Someone has to state the obvious and that someone is me!
 

Offline mikeymikeTopic starter

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #3 on: March 17, 2004, 12:07:43 AM »
red, that's so uncreative I would have expected to see it in a recent X-Files episode! :-D
 

Offline B00tDisk

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #4 on: March 17, 2004, 12:12:00 AM »
Isn't there some famous english football (nee Soccer) player who subscribes to this theory that reptile men are trying to invade/take over the world?

That's whos behind this.

Them and Lord Kinbote.
Back away from the EU-SSR!
 

Offline Roj

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #5 on: March 17, 2004, 12:12:19 AM »
Elvis seen wearing a Boing Ball cap and leather jacket outside a bar & grill in southern Alabama; film at 11
I sold my Amiga for a small fortune, but a part of my soul went with it.
 

Offline redrumloa

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #6 on: March 17, 2004, 12:12:42 AM »
Quote

mikeymike wrote:
red, that's so uncreative I would have expected to see it in a recent X-Files episode! :-D


Uncreative? I resemble that comment :-P
Someone has to state the obvious and that someone is me!
 

Offline AltRN8

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #7 on: March 17, 2004, 12:21:54 AM »
Damn you!
Thats why I just bought one of those Prometheus boards.
Oh, no I can feel you making me want to buy one of the Kickstart boards too...
Damn your evil powers ;)
 

Offline jeffimix

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #8 on: March 17, 2004, 12:37:10 AM »
I think that Catweasel S2 is talking to me in my sleep... must buy Xsurf.....

Personally I think that Microsoft are out to get me wallet, and the government me civil liberties!!! They're gonna use their mind ray on me again, I can feel it nooooo!
\\"The only benchmarks that matter is my impression of the system while using the apps I use. Everything else is opinion.\\" - FooGoo
 

Offline ShadesOfGrey

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #9 on: March 17, 2004, 12:45:57 AM »
:idea:

Due to their hatred of the Amiga, Medhi Ali and Irving Gould have orchestrated every event in Amiga's history since Commodore's demise.  They seek to torture those loyal to the platform by continuously givng us hope and then yanking it away...  

Or some variation along those lines...
Unless otherwise explicitly stated, this message is not meant to affirm nor deny, defend nor offend any faction within the \\\'Amiga\\\' Community.
 

Offline Targhan

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #10 on: March 17, 2004, 03:46:10 AM »
As a former assistant webmaster of Amiga.org, I feel it is my solemn duty to the community to blow the whistle on this entire fraudulent misuse of the internet.

During the early nineties, when the internet was still young with the strings being pulled by Al Gore, a secret committee was formed to ensure that the AmigaOS and it's highly religeous followers would remain in check.  This whole operation was done, in part, to protect the jobs of 85% of the I.T. industry dependant on the bugs found in Microsoft products.

This terrible secret was unfortunately kept hidden from Gateway, but known by the executives of VisCorp.  A collection of websites were created to control the masses, while the government placed figureheads in various CEO positions, and moles within the community to control the ebb and flow of information.  The leaders of the sites, Amiga.org, ANN.lu, and Amiga-News.de were chosen by a panel made up of experts in mass control, the music industry.  Once in place, a small circle of perimiter websites were funded to help fuel the fire, such as AmigaCentral.com, and the Amiga Web Directory.  These were designed as stepping stone sites to further corral the user-base into a smaller corner of the internet.

Bill Buck, knowing of the conspiracy, pulled the plug on the Viscorp deal, and hinted to Petro that Gateway would be a good candidate.  Gateway stepped in, and became a victim of the conspiracy.  Luckily for us, it actually saved the Government from having to create a second conspiracy to deal with *them*.  By the time Gateway discovered, through a still secret witness, provided by the NCAA (how they became involved is still a mystery, but we of the webmasters destruction committee believe it has something to do with the University of Tennessee and some rogue booster).  In the end, Gateway pulled out, selling Amiga to the perfect scapegoat, Amino.

Due to the difficulties of conspiracy withdrawal syndrome, Bill Buck applied to the US Government for a new contract to finish off the Amiga Community.  At first the WDC (Webmasters Destruction Committee) revelled in this renewal of the age-old contract that ensured that the I.T. industry would survive.  It wasn't long though, before Amiga Inc felt that they needed to up the stakes, by applying for more funds to help fight off the threat of no threat.  While the paperwork took a while to fill out (The Belgium government is always so slow, since their lawyers double as clerks), the end loomed ever nearer.

In the end, Amiga Inc, through their newly founded government contract through KMOS will allow the war to continue.  The WDC can finally get back to what we do best, keeping you fighting amongst yourselves, ensuring the survival of the IT industry.

This has been cleverly hidden conspiracy used for years to keep you, the Amiga community, entertained and out of the mainstream where a stable OS that was built with common sense might just destroy an entire industry, upsetting the world economy.


Sorry Wayne, but I had...  To Let the World Know!

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Regards,
Targhan
 

Offline B00tDisk

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #11 on: March 17, 2004, 03:53:49 AM »
Quote

Targhan wrote:


Sorry Wayne, but I had...  To Let the World Know!

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Brought to you by: The Chocolate Milk Tastes Good Consortium


He knows.

Kill him.
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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #12 on: March 17, 2004, 03:59:16 AM »
Dammit Dave...  Now we have to kill everyone.  Do YOU have cab fare for over 100 different countries?  Given the circumstances I know that *I* don't have the money for it.

Wayne
 

Offline Doobrey

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #13 on: March 17, 2004, 04:01:24 AM »
Quote

B00tDisk wrote:
He knows.

Kill him.


And now you know too  :destroy:

Crap, now I know ..  :nervous:
On schedule, and suing
 

Offline Targhan

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Re: The current situation, conspiracy theories please
« Reply #14 on: March 17, 2004, 04:02:44 AM »
Look, Wayne, it's time to give it up.  Our next target is MacOS, so let's just move on.  I don't think Bush will fund our anti-common-sense campaign any longer.  We need to move on to the anti-originality mission.

(let's hope we can get there before the former BeOS interference committee can)
Regards,
Targhan