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Author Topic: Groaner's Corner [was:EMINEM]  (Read 191479 times)

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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner: The Return!
« on: April 20, 2003, 12:11:56 AM »
 Two women are talking about relationships and stuff..(you know, the usual girlie stuff men go down the pub to avoid)

 One turns to the other and asks.." Do you smoke after sex?"
 The other woman thinks for a while, then replies "I dunno, I`ve never looked "
 :-P
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #1 on: September 11, 2003, 01:43:44 AM »
Q. What do you do when you see a spaceman??

 A. Well, you like..er, park in it man.
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #2 on: September 11, 2003, 01:47:20 AM »
Two Irishmen are walking past the job centre, when Paddy notices a new sign in the window.
 "Hey Mick,it says here they`re looking for treefellers"
  Mick says "Ah well, `tis a shame there`s only the two of us" :-P
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #3 on: September 11, 2003, 02:04:51 AM »
An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman are talking about their families,
Englishman: "I`ve got a boy, we called him George because he was born on St.George`s day"
Scotsman :"I`ve got a boy as well, called him Andrew cos he was born on St.Andrew`s day"
Irishman:" I`ve got a boy called Pancake"
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #4 on: September 11, 2003, 11:21:41 PM »
Q.What do you call a man with a spade in his head?
A. Doug.

Q. What do you call a man without a spade in his head?
A. Douglas.
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #5 on: September 15, 2003, 12:21:43 AM »
The Lone Ranger and Tonto were merrily riding across the plains, when suddenly Tonto stopped and dismounted his horse. He got down on all fours, put one ear to the ground and signalled to the Lone Ranger to be quiet.
 After a couple of minutes, he stood up and said "Me think buffalo come".
 The Lone Ranger was stunned, he looked all around but could neither see or hear anything.
 "Tonto, that`s amazing..how do you know that?" he asked..
 Tonto replied "Me got sticky ear" ;-)
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #6 on: September 15, 2003, 11:35:20 PM »
Two friends get off the ski lift on their first ever skiing holiday.
 Fred turns to Pete and says " It`s easy, you just push off and go zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag and you`re at the bottom"
 Pete looks confused, and says "I`m sure it`s the other way around..push off and go zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig"
 "No no no " says Fred "It`s zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag"
 Pete`s still not sure, "I could have sworn on TV they go zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig"

Just then, they spot another guy getting off the ski lift and decide to settle the arguement.
 Fred wonders over to the guy and asks " Me and my friend were wondering what`s the right way to go down this slope, is it zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag or zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig-zag-zig ?"
 The other guy scratches his head, stokes his chin and thinks for a while , then replies "I`ve got no idea, I don`t ski, I`m a tobogannist"
 Quick as a flash, Fred asks "In that case, can I have 20 Marlboro ?"

 :-D
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #7 on: January 19, 2005, 03:27:49 AM »
Did you hear about the Swedish guy who found God after rehab?

.....He was a Bjorn-again Christian.
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #8 on: January 19, 2005, 03:29:38 AM »
A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"

The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."  :-D
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #9 on: March 29, 2005, 11:12:27 PM »

Q. What`s yellow and buzzes ?

A. A daffodildo


Did you hear about the recent layoffs at the Moscow State Circus ?
 The human canonball got fired ...


I`ll get me coat...
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #10 on: May 01, 2005, 08:28:54 PM »
Oh dear God... please make the bad man stop... :lol:
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Offline Doobrey

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Re: Groaner's Corner Reloaded
« Reply #11 on: May 01, 2005, 08:30:06 PM »
Q. What colour are hiccups ??


A. Burple.
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