Groaner's Corner [was:EMINEM]

[smerf]

Hi,

A American boy riding a bicycle up a mountain road was having a rough time on this very hot day when another American driving a Vette came up alongside and said "Hey I can't put that bike in my trunk but I think I can give you a lift up the mountain by using a rope I have in my trunk, I'll just tie the rope to the bumper and you tie the rope to your bike and I will pull you up the mountain. The boy said I like the idea but what happens if you get going to fast how do I get you to slow down?

The vette owner replied " I'm a coach for a football team and I have a whistle if I get going to fast just blow the whistle and I will slow down.

So they do this great plan.

Half way up the mountain a German in a porche pulls up by the side of the Vette and yells that machine of yours has no balls and takes off up the mountain, now the Vette owner gets really ticked off and starts to show the german American power by putting the pedal to the medal the Vette is half way up to it's top end at 220 mph pulls up side by side with the porche.

They both pass a California Highway patrolman. Now the CHP has to call in and says,
"Hey sarge you aren't going to believe this but I have a Vette and a porche doing 220 mph up this mountain and then I have a kid on a bike blowing a whistle trying to pass".

(Groan)

Smerf

[smerf]

Hi,

If you liked the last one you sure will like this one.

A policeman pulls over a little old lady for speeding.

The little old lady says but officier I was only doing 55 mph .

The policeman says

"But lady this is the Sears parking lot"

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An artist, an archatect and a nun all die and arrive at the pearly gates.

Micheal greets them and tells them I only have room left for one today, I am sorry but 2 will have to go down to hell and only one will get to go in to heaven.

Tell me why you think you would be better than the other two.

 The artist says I paint pretty pictures that would brighten up heaven for Gods eyes.

The Archatect says hmmmph I drew up blueprints that construction people used to build the most gorgeous buidings, this would definetly be useful in heaven to God.

Now the Nun who was holding a plastic soda bottle filled with water said not a word, she walks up in front of Micheal reaches up and whips off her dress pulls down her panties, squats down and sticks the plastic soda bottle filled with water up her ass and squeezes as hard as she could three times. Takes the soda bottle out of her ass and releases the most nauseases crap all over the place.

Micheal looks at the nun and say you may enter, now the artist and the archatect both yell foul, why did she win?

Micheal looks at the two and says gentlemen a royal flush beats a pair any day of the week.