The Unofficial Professor F J Lewis Appreciation Thread

[Boot_WB]

Ahh, ummm.. an interesting visual image, one which brings to mind the works of Dickens and the late Victorian polarisation between the middle and lower classes. An interesting time from the perspective of social history - a disparate and desperate era, where industrial and scientific progress in the British Empire can be juxtaposed against a social backdrop of injustice and poverty.

One of the more enduring images in the popular consciousness from that time is that of Oliver Twist. A ragged and pathetic figure sunk to the lowest depths of deprivation in the workhouses of Old London; so low in his expectations that the grey and greasy gruel - which would be deemed unfit for human, or indeed animal, consumption in this more modern era was a lofty dream which inspired him to ask "Please sir, can I have some more?"

That's you taking your girlfriend out for a meal on Valentine's day that is. That's your idea of a swanky restaurant. That's your five-star gourmet meal cooked by Gordon Ramsey.

[X-ray]

I see.

[X-ray]

I at least can get to London, having been attracted to said civilisation by like-minded academics, and having acquired the wherewithal to purchase and pilot a suitable vehicle for taking a significant other to the restaurant.

See a derelict tramp, his clothes in threads, his features gaunt, his appearance lacking any kind of charm or sophistication? See how he nervously clutches the last remaining rusted coins in his possession, as he leans haphazardly against the bus shelter, his odour almost physically pushing the other customers away?
That's you, that is.
That's you waiting for the number 130 bus, hoping you'll catch the one that your girlfriend is driving, so you won't have to pay the bus fare. That's what happens in Yorkshire as opposed to London.

[Karlos]

See a derelict tramp, his clothes in threads, his features gaunt, his appearance lacking any kind of charm or sophistication? See how he nervously clutches the last remaining rusted coins in his possession, as he leans haphazardly against the bus shelter, his odour almost physically pushing the other customers away?

That's your best mate, that is. That's who you talk to when not standing in the town square stamping your barely booted foot and shouting at nobody in particular whilst ineffectually attempting to swat some the orbiting nebula of flies.

Sadly, you haven't even spoken to him since he accused you of cramping his style...


(that any good?)

[bloodline]

Karlos wrote:

See a derelict tramp, his clothes in threads, his features gaunt, his appearance lacking any kind of charm or sophistication? See how he nervously clutches the last remaining rusted coins in his possession, as he leans haphazardly against the bus shelter, his odour almost physically pushing the other customers away?

That's your best mate, that is. That's who you talk to when not standing in the town square stamping your barely booted foot and shouting at nobody in particular whilst ineffectually attempting to swat some the orbiting nebula of flies.

Sadly, you haven't even spoken to him since he accused you of cramping his style...


(that any good?)

I am aware of the gentleman in question... I have it upon good authority that you go to him for fashion advice.

You think he’s really cool, he is! You steal his clothes when he’s asleep so that you have something nice to wear, if you go on a date… which you don’t, unless you count your mum…

[motorollin]

bloodline wrote:
I am aware of the gentleman in question... I have it upon good authority that you go to him for fashion advice.

You think he’s really cool, he is! You steal his clothes when he’s asleep so that you have something nice to wear, if you go on a date… which you don’t, unless you count your mum…

@bloodline
That was *your* mum.

[X-ray]

He is going to cry.

[bloodline]

motorollin wrote:

bloodline wrote:
I am aware of the gentleman in question... I have it upon good authority that you go to him for fashion advice.

You think he’s really cool, he is! You steal his clothes when he’s asleep so that you have something nice to wear, if you go on a date… which you don’t, unless you count your mum…

@bloodline
That was *your* mum.

He had to, 'cos I saw your Mum coming out of the V.D clinic.

[motorollin]

:lol:
Touché!

[bloodline]

motorollin wrote:
:lol:
Touché!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UMedd03JCA

;-)

[motorollin]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

"Your mum" jokes are the staple of conversation between me and my best mate. The bit in that video where he said "That's 'My Life As A Prostitute' by your mum" had me wetting myself!

[bloodline]

motorollin wrote:
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

"Your mum" jokes are the staple of conversation between me and my best mate. The bit in that video where he said "That's 'My Life As A Prostitute' by your mum" had me wetting myself!

You have little choice then but to search for "History Today" on You Tube :-)

[motorollin]

WIP :-)

[Karlos]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

"Your mum" jokes are the staple of conversation between me and my best mate. The bit in that video where he said "That's 'My Life As A Prostitute' by your mum" had me wetting myself!

See a pair of wizened old tramps at the end of a dank alley, sprawled amid the torn refuse bags left behind by a waste disposal service that took exception to their contents? See their derelict disposition as they pick listlessly through the discarded detritus of a society that casually pretends to ignore their collective failure in even allowing such destitution in their midst? Do you hear their unintelligible, monosyllabic methylated spirit ruined argument?

That's you and your best mate, that is. That's you exchanging "your mum" jokes.

[motorollin]

Edit -

Clearly I've put my foot in it, but I'm not sure why. Karlos, please check your PM

[Karlos]

Edit -

Clearly I've put my foot in it, but I'm not sure why. Karlos, please check your PM

Don't worry, just keep any scathing History Today insults levelled at me instead