Hi melott,
A couple of things:
Hit Ctrl+Alt+Del, and have a look at some of the programs running in tandem with Windows.
Our goal is to minimize that.
Close that window, Click on "Start", "Run", then type:
msconfig
Press enter, and on the tab labelled "General" (the first tab), make sure that "Selective Startup"
is ticked.
Then, click on the tab labelled "Startup".
Here, you will see tasks that Windows loads at startup, including your Wife's
programs.
Uncheck anything you DO NOT want to load at startup. Things like "systray.exe", "taskmon.exe",
and "rundll32.exe..." should be left checked. To be sure of an item, you can punch it's filename into
google or a website like liutilities.com, and find out whether it's safe/unsafe/necessary or not.
Save your changes, reboot the system, hit Ctrl+Alt+Del again, and have a look. You can start
"whittling" away at all unnecessary processes, and Windows will begin to load and operate much nicer.
My suggestion, would be to create a new folder on your desktop, and have either you (or your Wife)
create shortcuts to all of her programs, and put them in the new folder.
BUT, before all of this, run SpyBot, RegCleaner (start RegCleaner, go to "Tools", then "Registry Tools",
and click on "Do them All") and the TrendMicro 'online' virus scanner (clear all browser caches before
running the virus scanner). After you're done getting rid of unnecessary startup items, run RegCleaner
again (this will also give you the option of cleaning up the mess in your "msconfig/startup items" list).
Personally, I do not run any anti-virus software (like Norton/McAffee) with 98. I use the above tools,
mozilla firefox, and fire up the occasional "online" virus scanner. I have no problems with this method,
in fact, my Win98SE install was actually a completely crashed, virus-ridden mess salvaged from a friend's
"dead" PC, and subsequently "relocated" to another computer. I've NEVER had to completely reinstall any
OS, although there are cases where it's necessary. YMMV.
The above is really only the tip of the iceberg, but if you're patient and have the desire you can get Windows
running _very_ stable and responsive.
Here is a great site full of information on cleaning up and optimizing
your 98 install.
About switching to XP...if you like 98, and it works for you, there's really no reason to change. I like 98,
but as soon as I can afford it and have time I'm installing 2000 or XP. It's probably something to consider doing, eventually.
-edit- Oh...and make sure to backup your data:-P