Man... Is This World Mental Or What !!!

[Franko]

Just took delivery of my shopping from both ASDA & TESCO... :eek: No tobacco in either delivery both of them "out of stock", starting to develop a nervous twitch already... :nervous:

So I though Hmmm... wonder if you can buy tobacco anywhere else online, a quick google and bob's yer uncle tons of places selling tobacco but unfortunately most of em look decidedly dodgy, think I'll just have to nip down to the local newsagent instead...

The thing I found totally bizarre and just downright absurd in this wee search, were the genuine websites whom it seems by law have to issue the following warning on their websites...

Typical Example Of A World Gone MAD

WARNING: This site contains images of tobacco. If you are under 18 then please leave now.

WTF !!!

I've seen some crazy and absurd things in my time, like warnings on kids cartoon DVD's that say "WARNING: Contains scenes of MILD PERIL", WTF's "MILD PERIL" zat like someone farting in a lift and you can't get out until your stop three floors away... :crazy:

But c'mon a ruddy warning that a site contains "images of tobacco" !!!

Yeah, I can imagine the depravity and sheer horror that a picture of a packet of fags or a pouch of tobacco could induce, the poor unwary viewer would have been scared for life mentally if they were exposed to such a despicable and filthy images such as 20 Woodbines...

fur gawds freakin sake, WTF's wrong with this bloody planet !!!

What next...

WARNING: This site contains images of PASTA. If you're not Italian please leave now.

or

WARNING: This site contains IMAGES. If your mentally disturbed like those who make they rules up, please gouge out your eyes now before proceeding.

Someone needs to push the big RED BUTTON NOW and save us all from this mental frigging world we live in... :python:

Think I'll just send an wee email to Downing Street warning them me and the SNP (Squirrel Ninja Patrol) are about to launch an all out custard pie attack on the thick buggers... :rolleyes:

[Pyromania]

Smoke green tea leaves, much better for you.

[XDelusion]

Really? I've never tried that.

[Franko]

Smoke green tea leaves, much better for you.

True story this... Way back in the late 80's I was working on a building site, back then I used to smoke cigars. One day at lunchtime I went into the site hut where we went to eat our lunch only to find that someone had nicked some of my cigars...

Later on that afternoon I smelt cigars being smoked from another room in the offices we were building, when I looked the guys were just smoking roll ups. It wasn't until closer inspection I realised one of the buggers had ran out of tobacco and had nicked some of my cigars, broke them up and made "roll ups" out of them.

Let's just say I wasn't amused (they were expensive cigars), so the next day I got my own back on the person who was responsible. While he was busy working I managed to get hold of his baccy tin and mixed his tobacco with tea leaves from a tea bag...

As the day wore on, every time he made a fag the smell was awful and he coughed and sputtered the more and more he smoked until he eventually had such a coughing fit that he burst some blood vessels in his left eye...

Suffice to say after a small punch up and him been taking to hospital to get his eye seen too, smoking tea leaves aint recommended and is definitely not an alternative to tobacco...

If you don't believe me try it, (use Tetley Tea Bags, they're the worst)...

[gunni]

I agree Franko its gone absolutely bonkers...
on the subject of tobacco, how is the proposed ban of the display of tobacco products supposed stop anyone smoking? I can picture the scene now -
guy: "Can I have 20 Lambert & Butler please?"
cashier takes a wee peek under the counter: "nope, we haven't got those"
guy: "Richmond?"
cashier looks again: "Nope"
guy: "FFS! What have you got then?"
cashier lists the entire stock whilst a mile long queue develops.
Yeah, genius that idea!
Mild peril... utter tosh! I wonder if they've deemed the board game "Cluedo" unsuitable for kids yet or set up counselling hotlines for kids having nightmares about Colonel Mustard coming after them with a candlestick!
One last piece of madness... a packet of nuts: "WARNING CONTAINS NUTS"!!!! WTF!

[Franko]

I agree Franko its gone absolutely bonkers...
on the subject of tobacco, how is the proposed ban of the display of tobacco products supposed stop anyone smoking? I can picture the scene now -
guy: "Can I have 20 Lambert & Butler please?"
cashier takes a wee peek under the counter: "nope, we haven't got those"
guy: "Richmond?"
cashier looks again: "Nope"
guy: "FFS! What have you got then?"
cashier lists the entire stock whilst a mile long queue develops.
Yeah, genius that idea!
Mild peril... utter tosh! I wonder if they've deemed the board game "Cluedo" unsuitable for kids yet or set up counselling hotlines for kids having nightmares about Colonel Mustard coming after them with a candlestick!
One last piece of madness... a packet of nuts: "WARNING CONTAINS NUTS"!!!! WTF!

Yup the world has gone utterly bonkers with all this nanny state and PC crap... :crazy:

In my local Morrisons they have already begun to move the fags under the counter even though there is still a huge sign saying TOBACCO above it... :lol:

Next thing you know guys will be lining up in raincoats, looking very sheepish and dodgy, just waiting till it's quiet enough to pluck up the courage and approach the counter and beckon the assistant across and whisper those shameful words 20 King size please, while you next wander of to the magazine rack a pull down the latest copy of Playboy that's proudly on display for all the world to see... :roflmao:

The whole friggin planet is run but absolute loonies these days, I remember back in the late 80's they banned Noddy from schools cause Noddy had a golliwog as a friend and a wee pal with Big Ears... :rolleyes:

Wonder what rating they give Tom & Jerry these days must be XXX at least or now that I think about it, it's probably banned altogether as I haven't seen a Tom & Jerry cartoon on TV for years...

There are only two choices here, start a revolution and fight to bring back sanity and common sense to this f'd up world, or press the big red button and leave the planet to the only sensible creatures left on it... the animals...

PS: the "WARNING: CONTAINS NUTS" should be posted directly above the Houses Of Parliament, much more suitable and appropriate methinks...

[Franko]

Think I found the answer to me own question when I asked "what next"...

It's *******...

You simply cant say ******* here anymore, not even if you were posting a suicide note saying your were opening up the ******* to jump out of em...

HANDY TIP: for those about to commit sideyways, best to use a gas oven instead if your going to post your farewell note here, cos saying you were going to leap from the nearest *******, is just going to leave lots of unanswered questions...

[Kesa]

Hiding ciggies under the counter is normal in Australia. But they don't always put them under the counter, sometimes they put them in a big cupboard or draw opposite the counter out of sight. They are not allowed to be on public display. Also they are introducing plain packaging pretty soon.

[Franko]

Hiding ciggies under the counter is normal in Australia. But they don't always put them under the counter, sometimes they put them in a big cupboard or draw opposite the counter out of sight. They are not allowed to be on public display. Also they are introducing plain packaging pretty soon.

They are doing that here too...

Next thing you know the coppers will be sticking their noses through your letter box to see if your smoking inside your own house...

Still... it could be worse... they might ban Amiga's next or only allow you to mention them by talking to yourself and using them all on your own in a dark room...

Uh Oh... wait... I already do that... think I'd better get rid of these two Spanish lesbos and get meself a computer instead...