Scratched testicles, and other anecdotes...

[Karlos]

:roflmao:

"Feck! Ma arse is despicable! Ah, lavatory... Who's y' daddy!"

The assistant must have been dying to laugh :-D

[graffias79]

Ewww hahahaha!  I would have died of embarrassment, I am what you would call a shameful sh*tter lol

-Jamie

[X-ray]

"..."Feck! Ma arse is despicable! Ah, lavatory... Who's y' daddy!"..."

--------------------------------------------------------


 :lol:

I was definitely that lav's daddy.


@ Graffias

The embarrassment was almost tangible...as was the terrible reek.

[Karlos]

The air was so thick you cut a slice to show the guys down the pub, eh?

-edit-

Say, you haven't been helping the Canadian Government in it's SMP (Scatalogical Munitions Programme) have you?

[X-ray]

 :lol:

Unfortunately, although I was offered a lot of money by the Canadian government for my 'weapons' I have been unsuccessful in providing them with a sample. It seems no container is up to spec: the stuff eats through anything. The works department wants to know why there is three-floors-worth of acid-type damage, originating from the restroom. It's like a scene from 'Alien'

[Karlos]

Which begs the question, what the hell did you eat?

Logically, however, all you need to contain a sample is a section of your own large intestine. Although I can appreciate the reluctance....

[X-ray]

I think it was a Chinese takeaway.

My theory is that the radiation to which I am exposed daily had an amplifying effect on that toxic sludge. I might as well have eaten a bag of shrimps and fermented apricots that had been left in the bottom of a latrine on a hot summer's day in the Sahara.

Actually the more I think of this, I can't believe I'm still alive  :lol:

[Karlos]

I might as well have eaten a bag of shrimps and fermented apricots that had been left in the bottom of a latrine on a hot summer's day in the Sahara.

Yeah, but it would have taken longer to arrive...

[X-ray]

"...Yeah, but it would have taken longer to arrive..."

 :lol:

Okay, maybe said bag could have been put in the engine compartment of the number 24 to Pimlico and collected after a day's rounds.

[Karlos]

You can't beat a really bad take out for making the next day sheer hell, can you?

I won't go into detail but suffice to say I have shared similar experiences. Although at least there was nobody immediately in the vicinity when I explosively voided (Mount Vesuviarse)...