Your view too, is perfectly valid.
I was happy with the old tank mouse for many years.
So was I. But time has passed, and in the years flown by I have gotten used to mice with 3 buttons and / or scroll wheel.
I even remember that I used a different mouse (3 button) on the Amiga in the last years, but that rodent has been lost in time.
And I never needed a middle mouse-button except in X11 or Oberon.
I used Modula-2, so I might need a 3 button mouse there too. I vaguely remember playing around with Oberon-2 on the Amiga as well, I wonder if I have that installation somewhere.
So, maybe you should embrace the old rodent and give it another try, before buying a cocolino. Try to remember that smooth movements are better for your hands, and you will notice that a rolling ball can pick up these very well.
Well, I have used it now, and no matter how I try, it doesn't feel comfortable. It will have to be put back into storage.