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Author Topic: WEEEEEEEEKEND!  (Read 6253 times)

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Offline Karlos

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Re: WEEEEEEEEKEND!
« on: February 23, 2007, 09:29:56 PM »
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NoFastMem wrote:

Marmite: Discuss.


Sold as "yeast extract", Marmite is really processed tholin (a thick, black tarry organic substance), which is secretly shipped from specialist extraction facilities on Titan. Raw tholin is harvested from drainage channels and basin areas, processed by the facilites there and then boosted into orbit by a mass driver.

Once in orbit, ion propulsion is employed to accelerate the tholin containers into the suns gravity well where they travel for years before decelerating the last few months into a steady earth orbit. They are then recovered by specialist probes maintained by the IIS and their contents either shipped back by returning shuttle flights, or carefully allowed to aerobrake against the atmosphere and fall to splashdown for recovery.

The processed tholin is then packaged as marmite and sold to the customer.

Not to be confused with vegemite, which is actually processed turd.
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Offline Karlos

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Re: WEEEEEEEEKEND!
« Reply #1 on: February 24, 2007, 06:06:36 PM »
@Chris

I just don't find the notion of something that looks like it has been scraped out of the soiled nappy of a somewhat unwell infant and subsequently smeared on toast or whatever very appetising ;-)
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Offline Karlos

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Re: WEEEEEEEEKEND!
« Reply #2 on: February 24, 2007, 06:14:10 PM »
Incidentally, why is it considered vegeterian / vegan friendly when every pot contains the microscopic innards of countless trillions of previously living animals* that have undergone autolysis as a result of being exposed to high salt concentrations and then boiled to death?

I mean, it's just as barbaric as boiling lobsters alive...

*yeast are eukaryotic.
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Offline Karlos

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Re: WEEEEEEEEKEND!
« Reply #3 on: February 24, 2007, 09:03:59 PM »
As far as I recall, yeast are classified as animals though due to their full range of compatible metabolic processes. A quick look on Wiki says they are classified as fungi, despite this. I pointed out that they are eukaryotic in case someone tried to suggest they are lesser organisnm - such as those without nuclei ;-)

That and the fact I was mostly taking the p*ss...
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Offline Karlos

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Re: WEEEEEEEEKEND!
« Reply #4 on: February 25, 2007, 10:42:37 AM »
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NoFastMem wrote:
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Karlos wrote:

That and the fact I was mostly taking the p*ss...


And I swore I'd never be The Humourless Veggie. :/ Sorry mate.


That's ok. Still, I would have thought you'd know me better than to come out with something like that and be serious, by now :lol:
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Offline Karlos

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Re: WEEEEEEEEKEND!
« Reply #5 on: March 02, 2007, 08:52:38 PM »
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Marmite/vegemite tastes awful. I cannot imagine it tasting worse if it were made with a Grimsby prostitute's knickers.


Indeed. Such would be ambrosia in comparison!
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