I usually don't feed the trolls, but....
fastest production sedan @ nurburgring?
Cadillac CTS-V (7:59)
2nd fastest production coupe @ nurburgring?
Dodge Viper ACR (7:22.1)
(1st is the Gumpert Apollo Speed @ 7:11.5)
But, still, how exactly do American cars not "do" that, again?
To quote from the old arcade hit, I think it might have been "Punch Out":
BODY BLOW! BODY BLOW! JAB! Oooof! Well said, saved me the typing....