The Unofficial Professor F J Lewis Appreciation Thread

[CannonFodder]

You see that "Eugene Terreblanche?  That's your boyfriend that is!" ;-)

[CannonFodder]

History Today

[CannonFodder]

See that bag of "cheesy wotsits" being gleefully masticated in a "cottage" down Clapham Common by an ex-convict from the colonies?

Thats the only mouthful of manly goodness you can get to satiate your junkie like addiction since Heino ditched you for Little Jimmy Osmond that is.

[CannonFodder]

See your Mum?

You're crying right now because of your Mum.  She does it for money.

[CannonFodder]

You are crying because your Mum efficiently serviced the entire German Navy during WW2.

[CannonFodder]

For free.

[CannonFodder]

Your mum does it with you, for money.

She gives you your pocket money and you give it right back.

You're going to cry.  Again.

[CannonFodder]

Karlos wrote:

CannonFodder wrote:
Your mum does it with you, for money.

She gives you your pocket money and you give it right back.

You're going to cry.  Again.

That's from the original material if I'm not mistaken :-D

Bugger, my rouse is up.  I did drop hints about spending a lot of time in Israel about who I am.

[CannonFodder]

X-ray wrote:
He is on the phone, crying. Leave him for a bit. Don't stop him.

He's on the phone to your Mum.  On one of those german wank lines.  He's on the vinegar strokes by now I imagine.

[CannonFodder]

X-ray wrote:
"...That's from the original material if I'm not mistaken..."
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It is. I don't think CannonFodder grasps how this all works. He should learn a bit then come back.

I learned everything from your Mum about coming back.  I came all over her back during WW2

[CannonFodder]

And her face.

That's how you were conceived that is, during an 8 on 1 session in a U-Boat.

[CannonFodder]

You see that symptom of sociopathic disorders, where the person is convinced they are always correct?

General Pinochet had that disease, so did Franco.

They were real men.  They had balls, they didn't cry and they didn't munch chessy wotsits in a cottage full of used hyperdermics.

[CannonFodder]

Karlos wrote:

X-ray wrote:
He is on the phone, crying. Leave him for a bit. Don't stop him.

Yes, the news researcher has been filling me in on your incontinence pants breach, during our conversation. Tears of laughter are streaming down my cheeks now that I cleaned up the tearducts. I fear I am laughing so hard I may have a seizure. And then I'll look like you trying to dance.

It's the funniest thing you have ever done and you did it by virtue of a humiliating accident. Nothing you ever intended to be amusing ever has been, or ever will be.

Except when he "ate" a Jack Russells cheesy wotsit for the amusement of the U-Boot crew he calls Pa.

[CannonFodder]

Karlos wrote:

CannonFodder wrote:

X-ray wrote:
He is on the phone, crying. Leave him for a bit. Don't stop him.

He's on the phone to your Mum.  On one of those german wank lines.  He's on the vinegar strokes by now I imagine.

:-o

(do you even have those in old age?)

It is unusual to still have a mother when one is in old age, but his mother is a corpse he keeps in the rocking chair by the front window so people think he has a girlfriend.

It's him you are speaking to really, saying "ooh ahhh ooh" on the other end of the phone line.  He's on the vinegar strokes too.

[CannonFodder]

X-ray wrote:
"...
Do you see the posts made by CannonFodder? That represents a third contestant..."
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Well, if you a align yourself to futile attempts to participate of that quality, then I understand how you associate with that so-called contestant. Overall I would say that you are easily influenced and prone to lapsing into visual communication, perhaps a throw-back to your neanderthal heritage. It tends to happen when you are at a loss for words, which is often.
You are a man who is best suited to scrawling chalk figures on the inside of the deepest darkest caves, where no civilised man would find them and thereafter waste precious resources trying to decipher them, only to realise that it is pictorial record of your sexual triumphs involving the local fauna (and sometimes flora).
When participating in an adult debate, and hearing an unintelligible gurgle from an infant on its mother's lap in the audience, it does you no credit to draw on that as a sign of support. The input of a braying donkey caught in a quagmire is more valuable as a third contestant.
But, if you must align yourself with the donkey, I can't stop you.  

You see that pencil test? That test is the only one you ever had a chance of passing, yet you failed so miserably. Twice.