I'm guessing there's a termination issue. But if you can't resolve that, disabling autoboot seems to be the way to go. The thing you were missing is that you need a software version of the ROM in SYS:Expansion. Without that, the card is essentially disabled when autoboot is off.
V6.x of the soft-ROM is on the 2091 install disk available from various sources. Someone here (SpeedGeek, maybe?) recently put together a v7.0 soft-ROM, which Commodore never did. Search the forums and you should find it.