Amiga.org
Coffee House => Coffee House Boards => CH / Entertainment => Topic started by: CU_AMiGA on June 03, 2005, 12:56:14 PM
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Hey Yo!
I woke up, on what seemed to me, a perfectly normal Bank Holiday Morning. I looked out the window and it was a damn good sunny day. I then went downstairs, to have my breakfast and read newspaper (the breakfast at hand was a bowl of rice crispies). But when i turned to the music charts section, the sky clouded over... AND THE SKY TURNED BLACK! :-(
When i looked at the top 10 chart, i noticed that this tragic tune was at the top. CrAzY FrOg! (http://www.axelf.tv/axel_f_video.htm)
To say i was upset, was an undersatement. I was expecting my beloved Coldplay to be uplomp at the top. But oh no! Not these stupid English idiots! They had to pick a bloody scatchy bloody awful song. Words cannot describe my anger! :pissed:
Regards,
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What's amused me in all this is the fact that the music industry suits are somewhat miffed that a track as awful as Crazy Frog can get to number one.
The irony in this is staggering - those same people who have pedalled the airwaves with The Spice Girls, Boyzone, The Cheeky Girls etc are complaining about crap songs making the charts...
... But even this is nothing new. Back in 1981, Ultravox's Vienna was held off the top spot thanks to Joe Dolce with "Shaddup You Face", a crime for which he remains unpunished to this day.
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Well. The Swedish chart has had Schnappi - Das Kleine Krokodil in the number one spot this month. :-o
But that's the way it is. The majority of the world's population is stupid. And unfortunately stupid people are allowed to buy records.
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The Shock Of The Life: The DEATH Of England Music Charts
Hmmm, they've been dead for a long long time now.
The last time I listened to the charts was waaay back in 1995 when Nine Inch Nails released Closer. Simon Mayo screwed up and played the full uncut version on the radio :-D
The only time you got quality tunes on the radio was when John Peel or Mark & Lard or Tommy Vance were on.
Sadly two of those have gone and the others have split.
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Are we all forgetting Timmy Mallet and his Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini tripe, or his Tetris Song?
Or Aqua, or Westlife?
I have to say, much as I hate that crazy frog song, it's far better than any of the crap the SpiceGirls or Westlife* or Gareth Gates ever released.
*Basically any Cowell/Fuller produced crap
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The thing is, were the charts ever alive?
Even in the 'Golden era' of the sixties the top ten was usually filled with garbage.
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Wilse wrote:
The thing is, were the charts ever alive?
Even in the 'Golden era' of the sixties the top ten was usually filled with garbage.
The chart doesn't reflect all records that are bought, only what records by certain record labels are bought.
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The chart doesn't reflect all records that are bought, only what records by certain record labels are bought.
It's not often that those labels who are not in those chart outsell anything from the major labels though. Especially not when it comes to singles.
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The original flash of that 'frog' (you know....the F1 car) was quite funny before it got turned into a ringtone and was advertised every 5 minutes on the 'music' channels on TV...
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odin wrote:
5 minutes on the 'music' channels on TV...
We regularly get the ad *twice* per ad break on quite a few channels - all music ones and Sky Sports included.
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At a volume level 100% higher than the TV channel's own sound...
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odin wrote:
At a volume level 100% higher than the TV channel's own sound...
As a former employee of Sky TV I am privvy to the real reason that the volume is higher during the advert breaks.
Can anyone guess? It's really obvious too.
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mdma wrote:
As a former employee of Sky TV I am privvy to the real reason that the volume is higher during the advert breaks.
Can anyone guess? It's really obvious too.
Trying to make them think they're going deaf when the prog starts again? :-P
Or to scare them off to the kitchen to make a cuppa?
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I've always thought it was so that you'd pay more attention to it than you'd actually like.
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Wilse wrote:
I've always thought it was so that you'd pay more attention to it than you'd actually like.
Because 95% of viewers go to the kitchen/bog when the adverts come on, so the volume gets increased so you can still hear what they are trying to flog you.
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Should be illegal anyway. :-(
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mdma wrote:
Wilse wrote:
I've always thought it was so that you'd pay more attention to it than you'd actually like.
Because 95% of viewers go to the kitchen/bog when the adverts come on, so the volume gets increased so you can still hear what they are trying to flog you.
Everyone should do what we do then - press a little handy button called "mute" ;-)
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Vincent wrote:
mdma wrote:
Wilse wrote:
I've always thought it was so that you'd pay more attention to it than you'd actually like.
Because 95% of viewers go to the kitchen/bog when the adverts come on, so the volume gets increased so you can still hear what they are trying to flog you.
Everyone should do what we do then - press a little handy button called "mute" ;-)
Or buy a PVR with advert blocking! :-)
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*miserable Scottish git mode
Eh'm no payin fur that peece o crrrraap!
/miserable Scottish git
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Vincent wrote:
*miserable Scottish git mode
Eh'm no payin fur that peece o crrrraap!
/miserable Scottish git
Build your own with left over PC parts.
http://freevo.sourceforge.net/ (http://freevo.sourceforge.net/)
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Some time ago they got one of these TV executives to answer some questions about why the volume is increased during TV ads. The ponce sat there very smugly and said "Actually, there is no way we can alter the volume controls on your TV set. When the advertisements come on, your volume settings remain the same. So we are not guilty of changing the volume on your TV set."
Yep.
He then went on with some technical mumbo-jumbo about volume intensity vs volume itself and he managed to skirt the issue. I'd like to tape a bullhorn to his left ear and shout "ARSEHOLE!!"
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..or maybe just ram it somewhere the sun don't shine and force feed him a nice vindaloo... then he could get a new job as a foghorn. :evilgrin:
Alternatively, just hand him over to Karlos to put against his wall of shame (or is it no shame?)
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@ Doobrey
Ja, we should entrust him to the gentle graces of Karlos and Bloodline. I'm sure between the two of them they can sort out his smugness.
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Doobrey wrote:
..or maybe just ram it somewhere the sun don't shine and force feed him a nice vindaloo... then he could get a new job as a foghorn. :evilgrin:
Alternatively, just hand him over to Karlos to put against his wall of shame (or is it no shame?)
Plenty of room. Who wants first shot at him?
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send me a picture and i'll composit it showing him buggering a sheep.
the best revenge
:lol:
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Don't forget the XXXXXXXL club amiga t-shirt :-D
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PMC wrote:
... But even this is nothing new. Back in 1981, Ultravox's Vienna was held off the top spot thanks to Joe Dolce with "Shaddup You Face", a crime for which he remains unpunished to this day.
Whats your problem with Joe Dolce, huh?? "Shaddupa your face!!!" :-P :-D
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X-ray wrote:
Yep.
He then went on with some technical mumbo-jumbo about volume intensity vs volume itself and he managed to skirt the issue. I'd like to tape a bullhorn to his left ear and shout "ARSEHOLE!!"
Thanks X-ray, that's the funniest thing I've heard in ages :lol:
I'd love to do that to messrs Cowell, Fuller and Waterman too. Just before they're put up against a wall and shot.
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:lol:
Don't start me on Mr Simon Cowell. He is a sack of pus even when involved with things not musical. Do you remember how ungrateful he was when Top Gear gave him a trophy for going around their circuit in the fastest time as Star in a Reasonably Priced Car?
Here's how you deal with a ponce like that:
You strap him onto one of those rocket sleds that they test bunker-busting missiles with in the desert. You tie him onto the rocket and tell him he's about to be the fastest motherf*cker around. Then, just to make sure he's as glam as he can be, you pull his pants down, sprinkle some glitter on his arse, start the countdown and roll cameras. Points are awarded to the rocket engineers as follows:
1 POINT: Cowell remains strapped to the rocket as it breaks the sound barrier, but he is not on board when the rocket hits the test wall.
2 POINTS: Cowell comes off the rocket but still strikes the test wall.
3 POINTS: Cowell remains strapped to the rocket right up until impact.
Bonus points are awarded if the wind shear peels his scalp or his cheeks off, and maximum points are awarded if any glitter is found on the other side of the test wall.
Edit: if there was a way to play that Crazy Frog ringtone in his head (above the noise of the rocket) I would make sure that was the last thing he heard as the acceleration pulled his intestines out in a ribbon behind him just before impact.
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X-ray wrote:
and maximum points are awarded if any glitter is found on the other side of the test wall.
:roflmao:
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X-ray wrote:
Then, just to make sure he's as glam as he can be, you pull his pants down, sprinkle some glitter on his arse
Thanks for the mental image X-ray, I'll make sure I send you my psychiatrists bill. :pissed:
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@ Doobrey
I'll pass the bill on to dear Simon :-D
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On the behalf of the entire Swedish people, I apoligize for the creation of 'Crazy frog'. I now realise that the guy who made the original insanity test deserve to die a horrible death!
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whabang wrote:
On the behalf of the entire Swedish people, I apoligize for the creation of 'Crazy frog'. I now realise that the guy who made the original insanity test deserve to die a horrible death!
Now you made me curious: What's 'Crazy Frog'?(http://www.amiga.org/images/subject/icon26.gif)
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Remember the Insanity test (http://www.tekzoned.com/instest/)? Someone animated a frog, then someone bought the rights for the frog and the noise and then made aringtone out of it. The rest is too shameful to bring up here.
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Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
Now you made me curious: What's 'Crazy Frog'?(http://www.amiga.org/images/subject/icon26.gif)
Trust me, you're better off not knowing.
It's a horrible brain rotting song, far worse than anything Simon Cowell or Stock Aitken and Waterman could produce (and I use the word "song" in the loosest possible sense!)
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It is a stinking sack of pus audio virus.
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Go to joe cartoon's website and you can shove a frog in a blender. We can pretend it's the crazy frog :-D
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>Garbage
In 1996, there was a dance hit "Children" (Robert Miles) in UK Chart (US Chart: #2 February 1996).
In 1973, for 22 weeks, the #1 song in UK Chart was "Eye Level" (Simon Park Orchestra). On the same year there was a great song "Love's Theme" (Barry White).
In 1971, "Sleepy Shores" (Pearson) reach #8 at UK Chart.
In 1968, "Love Is Blue" (Mauriat) was a great hit in UK and reach #1 at US Chart.
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Hey!
That Robert Miles tune is fantastic. The original version without the singing that is.
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Tell you what
When the day comes, we'll round up the creators of the Crazy Frog, anybody who had any input into the development of it, those people who presently advertise the b*stard thing 3 times in a single commercial break and all those people who downloaded it and put them against the wall too.
Can't say fairer than that :-D
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Karlos wrote:
Tell you what
When the day comes, we'll round up the creators of the Crazy Frog, anybody who had any input into the development of it, those people who presently advertise the b*stard thing 3 times in a single commercial break and all those people who downloaded it and put them against the wall too.
Can't say fairer than that :-D
Stop being so specific in your genocide plans Karlos.
Just massacre all the Mac and iPod users.
Instantly ridding humanity of soulless fashion whores in one foul swoop! :evilgrin:
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mdma wrote:
Just massacre all the Mac and iPod users.
Ahem..
I think you'll find you meant to say "Just massacre all the Mac users who don't still own Amigas, and who are slowly morphing into Steve Jobs lookalikes", didn't you? :inquisitive:
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Certianly owning an amiga reduces the chances of ending up along the wall, but it alone can't save you if:
1) You are an interior designer type
2) Don't mind the Crazy frog or similar bobbins
3) Wear burberry and/or cheap Argos jewellry
4) One of the other countless classes of people that get on my tits :lol:
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Hmm, if memory serves me correctly (which it often doesn't), Aren't you a self confessed Mac user too Karlos ? :inquisitive:
Anyway, I've just bought myself some protection incase you and mdma decide to pay me a visit.. I like to call it The iProd (http://www.redhillgeneralstore.com/A67232.htm). It'll also come in handy if I ever hear that wretched ring tone anywhere.
And as for your questions..
1. Nope
2. Nope
3. #### off
4. Very likely
5. Twice on Tuesdays.
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Doobrey wrote:
Hmm, if memory serves me correctly (which it often doesn't), Aren't you a self confessed Mac user too Karlos ? :inquisitive:
Not quite. I currently use macs at work, but come the day and I shall have to suffer them, nor their more feverent supporters no longer :evilgrin:
Anyway, I've just bought myself some protection incase you and mdma decide to pay me a visit.. I like to call it The iProd (http://www.redhillgeneralstore.com/A67232.htm). It'll also come in handy if I ever hear that wretched ring tone anywhere.
And as for your questions..
1. Nope
2. Nope
3. #### off
4. Very likely
5. Twice on Tuesdays.
4. Negative. You seem to have an inherent dislike of most of the things I dislike (crap TV celebrities and wannabes, 'reality' tv shows etc), so that makes you OK in my book.
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Doobrey wrote:
mdma wrote:
Just massacre all the Mac and iPod users.
Ahem..
I think you'll find you meant to say "Just massacre all the Mac users who don't still own Amigas, and who are slowly morphing into Steve Jobs lookalikes", didn't you? :inquisitive:
Nope.
No room for sympathy when you plan a mass genocide of this scale. Mac=Firing Squad.
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Doobrey wrote:
Hmm, if memory serves me correctly (which it often doesn't), Aren't you a self confessed Mac user too Karlos ? :inquisitive:
Anyway, I've just bought myself some protection incase you and mdma decide to pay me a visit.. I like to call it The iProd (http://www.redhillgeneralstore.com/A67232.htm). It'll also come in handy if I ever hear that wretched ring tone anywhere.
Your "lifestyle accessory" branded electric stick won't protect you from this. (http://world.guns.ru/sniper/sn66-e.htm) It's worked wonders during Israels infanticide campaign. ;-)
Get your Mac on ebay pronto is the best advice I can give! :-D
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Doobrey wrote:
Anyway, I've just bought myself some protection incase you and mdma decide to pay me a visit.. I like to call it The iProd (http://www.redhillgeneralstore.com/A67232.htm). It'll also come in handy if I ever hear that wretched ring tone anywhere.
:roflmao: Somehow I found that not-too-far-fetched name IProd very amusing :-).
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There is no bling in owning a Mac!! :cry:
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NoFastMem wrote:
There is no bling in owning a Mac!! :cry:
Substitute "bling" for "hope of survival come the revolution" if I let mdma be one of my deputies :lol:
Of course we have a problem, because Doobrey is going to take care of the changing rooms team, Pop Idol and X-Factor people, but he also has a Mac quite voluntarily.
Still, it wouldn't be the first totalitarian dictatorship that practised hypocritical double standards :lol:
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Karlos wrote:
NoFastMem wrote:
There is no bling in owning a Mac!! :cry:
Substitute "bling" for "hope of survival come the revolution" if I let mdma be one of my deputies :lol:
Of course we have a problem, because Doobrey is going to take care of the changing rooms team, Pop Idol and X-Factor people, but he also has a Mac quite voluntarily.
Still, it wouldn't be the first totalitarian dictatorship that practised hypocritical double standards :lol:
Just obliterate him after he's served his purpose. Just like Trotsky was! ;-)
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mdma wrote:
Just obliterate him after he's served his purpose. Just like Trotsky was! ;-)
Hey, overgrown mac owning Ewoks have feelings too :-x
Anyway, Citizen Karlos is in charge of the firing squad, it was his idea afterall.
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Actually, looking back at the plans, there's you, adz, mdma, yours truly in charge of ridding the world of the idiot / beurocratic classes.
Naturally, this is a big, big job. You'll each have manage entire squads. No time for bickering amongst the ranks, chaps :evilgrin:
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Doobrey wrote:
mdma wrote:
Just obliterate him after he's served his purpose. Just like Trotsky was! ;-)
Hey, overgrown mac owning Ewoks have feelings too :-x
Anyway, Citizen Karlos is in charge of the firing squad, it was his idea afterall.
Shush! Listen carefully. Lets overthrow the general! ;-)
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Karlos wrote:
Actually, looking back at the plans, there's you, adz, mdma, yours truly in charge of ridding the world of the idiot / beurocratic classes.
Naturally, this is a big, big job. You'll each have manage entire squads. No time for bickering amongst the ranks, chaps :evilgrin:
Shall we divvy up the North West between us then?
I'll take Lancashire and Cumbria, that leaves Greater (LOL) Manchester and Scouseland for you. :-)
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Divvy it up by workload. If you do Salford and Oldham as well it should even up. There's a larger percentage of plonkers in these 'ere urban places :-D
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Karlos wrote:
Divvy it up by workload. If you do Salford and Oldham as well it should even up. There's a larger percentage of plonkers in these 'ere urban places :-D
Yeah, but I'll have to travel further. There's mad buggers live up those big hills in Cumbria!
You could do a street at a time, especially in those posh flats in the city centre. There must be a good 20000 "arty" types with mac's in them places.
ps. Who's gonna bludgeon Bloodline to death now he's got a powerbook? ;-)
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mdma wrote:
ps. Who's gonna bludgeon Bloodline to death now he's got a powerbook? ;-)
It's a tough one really. I always thought he'd ride along with us. Damn that powerbook purchase, it'll be like having to blow away a family pet :-(
Oh well, I'll get my club...
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Karlos wrote:
mdma wrote:
ps. Who's gonna bludgeon Bloodline to death now he's got a powerbook? ;-)
It's a tough one really. I always thought he'd ride along with us. Damn that powerbook purchase, it'll be like having to blow away a family pet :-(
Oh well, I'll get my club...
:roflmao:
First thing to make me laugh out loud today that. :pint:
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mdma wrote:
Just massacre all the Mac and iPod users.
Looks like mdma has just volunteered himself for a spot of regicide.. :-o
Queen buys iPod (http://www.theinquirer.net/?article=24011)
(and yes, I know an Inquirer article quoting The Sun makes this about as credible as UK military intelligence)
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This Romanian band 'll be the next big thing on the continental music charts this summer :roflmao: (http://www.akcent.rol.ro/index-non.htm)
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Speelgoedmannetje wrote:
This Romanian band 'll be the next big thing on the continental music charts this summer :roflmao: (http://www.akcent.rol.ro/index-non.htm)
Probably will be in mainland Europe, but over here the girls (and some of the boys!) like their boy bands to be English or American.
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There is a new hits from the CRAZY FROG: Popcorn.
This video is based on 1960/1970s hits "Popcorn".
The video is about Crazy Frog underwater adventure with robots.
http://www.crazyfroghits.com