Amiga.org

The "Not Quite Amiga but still computer related category" => Alternative Operating Systems => Topic started by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 04:55:05 AM

Title: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 04:55:05 AM
I am now offering a unique offer: The Amitendo64 for only 400 dollars!


Since there have been much talk and fuss about various competing retro computer brands lately, I thought I'd point out the various ways the amitendo64 is superior.


1: Hardware
No atom processors here. You get a good, old fashioned 2.4 ghz dual core, with 4 gigs of RAM.
We even toss in an optical drive, and a mouse!

2: Software
While the competition expects you to install linux yourself, the amitendo64 has it included already!

3: Run all the awesome games
Our competition only includes emulation of commodore machines. We boldly include Nintendo as well. So even if you grew up outside europe, you can still play games from when you were a kid

4: No dubious license questions
Many people feel concerned that competing retro computer offers may take advantage of licenses that have a complicated history. No worries! The Amitendo64 has NO licenses with anybody so you don't have to feel bad about anything!

5: Support of a trusted player in the commodore market
The amitendo64 comes with a full 20 year warranty. Just drive to the Commodore Amiga Iran office and we'll give you a full refund.

6: Doesn't look too new
Many people feel that the competing offers are too shiny, and don't "feel retro".
To insure against this, the amitendo64 is pretty dusty. We even made sure the fan is kind of grimey, so you'll have an authentic experience!

7: More advanced software.
Our unique brand of operating software (codenamed Kubuntu) is actually workbench 5.01 making it far superior than the unreleased alternatives from competing brands!

8: No pre orders
We will ship the amitendo64 to its eager recipient immediately upon payment.

9: Branding
Since we know branding is very important to people, the case will have "COMMODORE AMIGA IRAN" scrawled with a sharpie. No impersonal stickers here!

For mass orders (more than one), there is a 20 minute delay, as that's long it takes me to run over to best buy to restock.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Iggy on April 08, 2011, 05:01:04 AM
Quote from: runequester;629942
I am now offering a unique offer: The Amitendo64 for only 400 dollars!


Since there have been much talk and fuss about various competing retro computer brands lately, I thought I'd point out the various ways the amitendo64 is superior.


1: Hardware
No atom processors here. You get a good, old fashioned 2.4 ghz dual core, with 4 gigs of RAM.
We even toss in an optical drive, and a mouse!

2: Software
While the competition expects you to install linux yourself, the amitendo64 has it included already!

3: Run all the awesome games
Our competition only includes emulation of commodore machines. We boldly include Nintendo as well. So even if you grew up outside europe, you can still play games from when you were a kid

4: No dubious license questions
Many people feel concerned that competing retro computer offers may take advantage of licenses that have a complicated history. No worries! The Amitendo64 has NO licenses with anybody so you don't have to feel bad about anything!

5: Support of a trusted player in the commodore market
The amitendo64 comes with a full 20 year warranty. Just drive to the Commodore Amiga Iran office and we'll give you a full refund.

6: Doesn't look too new
Many people feel that the competing offers are too shiny, and don't "feel retro".
To insure against this, the amitendo64 is pretty dusty. We even made sure the fan is kind of grimey, so you'll have an authentic experience!

7: More advanced software.
Our unique brand of operating software (codenamed Kubuntu) is actually workbench 5.01 making it far superior than the unreleased alternatives from competing brands!

8: No pre orders
We will ship the amitendo64 to its eager recipient immediately upon payment.

For mass orders (more than one), there is a 20 minute delay, as that's long it takes me to run over to best buy to restock.

Where's the order page?
Can I play NES Galaga on it?
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 05:05:31 AM
Quote from: Iggy;629946
Where's the order page?
Can I play NES Galaga on it?


Thats another advantage. Instead of a complicated order page, you can just mail the money.

It'll run any NES game totally awesome.


Also, since we know branding is very important to people, the case will have "COMMODORE AMIGA IRAN" scrawled with a sharpie. No impersonal stickers here!
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Retro_71 on April 08, 2011, 05:12:50 AM
Me want !!! how much shipping to OZ??
Much better then that other piece of crap!
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Iggy on April 08, 2011, 05:13:58 AM
Quote from: runequester;629949
Thats another advantage. Instead of a complicated order page, you can just mail the money.

It'll run any NES game totally awesome.


Also, since we know branding is very important to people, the case will have "COMMODORE AMIGA IRAN" scrawled with a sharpie. No impersonal stickers here!

Nicholas would love that. You've made my night!
Thanks! I do really love you guys (in a completely hetrosexual way).
Now I've got to skip over a thread and take some abuse from Franko before I go to bed.

Take care,
Jim
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Franko on April 08, 2011, 05:22:06 AM
At last heaven... :)

Can it play all me SNES RPG games (NTSC &PAL), can it emulate taking 15 minutes to load an old C64 game (loved waiting to see the "Load Error" message at the end... :)

Can I throw all me old Amiga accelerator cards in at once and not bother having to connect them (be handy that)... :)

Does it make a good cup of tea and do the washing at the same time... :)

Can squirrels use it (if supervised by a grown up)... :)

If so, where do I send the dosh (just printing it right now)... :)

(PS:I'll stick me own stickers on them cos I bought a load off ebay and was going to use them to sell genuine Commodore everything back on eeBlay bay again)... :)

Ta Very Glad... Your first customer... :D

PPS:What job title comes with this purchase... ???
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 05:24:30 AM
The case isn't all that big, but you can probably fit a few ACA accelerators in there. If you pay cash, we'll toss in some tape so you can tape them to the inside of the case.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: XDelusion on April 08, 2011, 05:26:30 AM
XDelusion: "I already got one."

Franko: "He says he's already got one!!!"
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Duce on April 08, 2011, 05:52:15 AM
For FIVE, yes FIVE extra dollars - I'll get strung out on cough syrup and draw a Mitchie paw and Padre signature on the case.  (in crayon only)
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 05:54:18 AM
Quote from: Duce;629971
For FIVE, yes FIVE extra dollars - I'll get strung out on cough syrup and draw a Mitchie paw and Padre signature on the case.  (in crayon only)


See guys. This is what happens when you hire a PR guy.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Duce on April 08, 2011, 05:55:04 AM
The best PR Nyquil can buy!
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: dentunes on April 08, 2011, 06:25:13 AM
Quote from: XDelusion;629964
XDelusion: "I already got one."

Franko: "He says he's already got one!!!"
Franko: Are you sure he's got one?

XDelusion: I told him he's already got one hehehehehe
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: TheBilgeRat on April 08, 2011, 07:03:23 AM
Quote from: dentunes;629975
Franko: Are you sure he's got one?

XDelusion: I told him he's already got one hehehehehe

Feche la vache!
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Retro_71 on April 08, 2011, 07:28:47 AM
Quote from: Franko;629961
Ta Very Glad... Your first customer... :D

PPS:What job title comes with this purchase... ???


HEY Franko my friend Sorry BUT i am his customer !!!!!!!!!! the job title is MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!

:banana: :rofl:
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 07:30:15 AM
PR is already taken, but if you can browse the best buy website, you can be our case designer.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: HenryCase on April 08, 2011, 09:50:31 AM
Quote from: runequester;629989
PR is already taken, but if you can browse the best buy website, you can be our case designer.


Ooh, pick me, pick me!! Here's my suggested case design:

(http://walyou.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/64-hackintosh1.jpg)
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: dentunes on April 08, 2011, 01:16:11 PM
Quote from: TheBilgeRat;629982
Feche la vache!
:) spot on!
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Hessu on April 08, 2011, 01:44:19 PM
The best case ever! For use with this new ami-platform, looking much better than the competitors pity efforts. Maybe less ?????'s now?
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: _ThEcRoW on April 08, 2011, 02:13:29 PM
???
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: whabang on April 08, 2011, 02:48:43 PM
Quote from: _ThEcRoW
???
Indeed! :lol:
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Hessu on April 08, 2011, 03:06:12 PM
Quote from: whabang;630078
Indeed! :lol:

?????
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Darrin on April 08, 2011, 03:27:33 PM
Quote from: HenryCase;630025
Ooh, pick me, pick me!! Here's my suggested case design:

(http://walyou.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/64-hackintosh1.jpg)


Can I buy the empty case for only $300?
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: HenryCase on April 08, 2011, 04:44:32 PM
Quote from: Darrin;630095
Can I buy the empty case for only $300?


Only if you pre-order.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Darrin on April 08, 2011, 04:45:28 PM
Quote from: HenryCase;630114
Only if you pre-order.


LOL.  In that case I want a t-shirt and a coupon too!  :D
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 04:47:45 PM
Quote from: Darrin;630095
Can I buy the empty case for only $300?


Absolutely. We'll even throw in an old amiga joystick you can put on your desk.
The competition doesn't do that either!
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: HenryCase on April 08, 2011, 04:49:31 PM
Quote from: Darrin;630116
LOL.  In that case I want a t-shirt and a coupon too!  :D


It's a deal. Operators are standing by... ;-)
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Darrin on April 08, 2011, 04:59:56 PM
Quote from: HenryCase;630120
It's a deal. Operators are standing by... ;-)


Free shipping and handling, or am I pushing it?
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: HenryCase on April 08, 2011, 05:18:11 PM
Quote from: Darrin;630125
Free shipping and handling, or am I pushing it?


(http://i56.tinypic.com/35jy1jo.jpg)
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 06:26:11 PM
haha, awesome :)
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: ChaosLord on April 08, 2011, 10:51:09 PM
@Runequester
How do you expect anyone to take your company seriously when you don't have anyone that copies & pastes text + gfx from other websites onto your corporate HQ website? :D
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 08, 2011, 11:07:02 PM
Quote from: ChaosLord;630260
@Runequester
How do you expect anyone to take your company seriously when you don't have anyone that copies & pastes text + gfx from other websites onto your corporate HQ website? :D


Is this a job application?
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Duce on April 08, 2011, 11:41:12 PM
Quote from: runequester;630268
Is this a job application?

 Looks like you've found yourself a new Advertising Executive.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: ChaosLord on April 09, 2011, 12:29:43 AM
You also need someone to yell at everyone and make inappropriate legal threats. :D

And you need a CFO with $30,000,000.00 in his bank account but who can't afford $500.00 for a USB bounty or AROS bounty. :D
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Amiduffer on April 09, 2011, 01:01:31 AM
Thanks for the comedy. I'm laughing so hard, its making me cry.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: CSixx on April 09, 2011, 01:20:59 AM
Best thread ever!
ROFL, I'm gonna start saving money now so I can get in on the first batch, there are bound to be tens of thousands of orders for this!
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 09, 2011, 01:25:11 AM
Quote from: CSixx;630326
Best thread ever!
ROFL, I'm gonna start saving money now so I can get in on the first batch, there are bound to be tens of thousands of orders for this!


I went to Best Buy earlier and they only had like 20 computers there. So the next 9980 customers may have to wait a bit.

Corporate expense account.. put a few more sharpies on there btw. These babies are HOT
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: dentunes on April 09, 2011, 01:54:51 AM
Are you offering any specials if I call within the next thirty minutes?
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: runequester on April 09, 2011, 01:59:25 AM
Quote from: dentunes;630331
Are you offering any specials if I call within the next thirty minutes?


If you order super quick, because I dont have that many minutes on my cell phone.

LIMITED EDITION:
I'll toss in the user guide to Jungle Strike. This is an exclusive offer that you will not find from any of the competitors. In fact, we are confident that this makes our documentation 100% more enjoyable to read.

Given that workbench 5.01 is already superior to the competition (AND pre-installed), this is a must-have purchase.
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: gertsy on April 09, 2011, 02:21:45 AM
I have serious doubts about the legitimacy of such a device?
But where do I send the cash?
Title: Re: Now selling: The Amitendo64 running workbench 5.1
Post by: Duce on April 09, 2011, 06:05:23 AM
1000th unit gets hand delivered by Franko, wearing nothing but a clown wig, wizards cap, and a kilt.  I'll foot the bill on that one.  ($5 extra for Franko to sign it)