Thank you all for your support, you've made me feel like maybe I shouldn't be afraid to post here. I still feel like I've failed the Amiga community because I had so many ideas for how to help, and for a little while I was able to communicate with others who could help make these ideas happen, but as well as spending too much time helping people with their individual problems (the reason I wrote a few guides was because so many people were asking me to help them through things step-by-step) I was also receiving a lot of criticism and negativity from several people in the community which really got me down. My online life means a lot to me because it's impossible for me to make friends or communicate easily in real life. I ended up meeting a few guys in real life after chatting on the forums or IRC, but they seemed weirded out by me and avoided contact afterwards. A lot of people ended up dumping their old, broken Commodore and Amiga junk on me, and this stuff was already piling up here. I have no idea about soldering or hardware repairs and the only person I knew who could fix them (AmigaManiac) also got depression and had a breakdown. So I feel like I can't move with the burden of all of this junk and responsibility and broken promises and failed dreams weighing me down.
Certainly don't feel afraid to post here, there are certainly people here who'd much rather see you here more frequently.
I hope you could make it the AUG meeting in Melbourne some day there might be people there who can help you deal with all the surplus gear you have although try selling or giving it away online first. If you get the chance to meet new people try not to let past experience put you off. Don't worry about the people who didn't remain friends, it's their loss and not yours.
Remember you're an amazing person with varied interests and real depth, anyone lucky enough to be your friend should treasure that.
In case you haven't kept up there's a couple of app stores on the way which I seem to remember was an idea first proposed by you. Even while you've been away it would seem that your inspiration has shone brightly.
Don't ever feel you failed the Amiga community, you have done far more than many people here and you had no obligation to do so. Just try to relax and have some fun while you're here.
