Amiga.org
Coffee House => Coffee House Boards => CH / Entertainment => Topic started by: X-ray on February 14, 2007, 05:13:51 PM
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Well here we are, it is February the 14th.
Roses are being sold and chocolates are being bought in the hope that they may grease any stubborn hinges to a special one's heart, (or more likely, dare I say in a cynical way, that special gifts are being bought in the hope that a bit of nookie may appear on the menu).
Now, being a confirmed batchelor and having weighed up what is available for a bit of dabbling and what it would take to grease that, I haven't made any purchases this year. Don't give me any stick about that, it was a logical decision and you would do well to do the same.
However...I received a card from across the waters and I thought I would tell you how I have been had.
My sister, bless her cotton socks, is studying nursing in Colorado. She got hold of a picture (probably emailed to her by one of her buddies here in the UK) of a male individual in a kilt. She liberally distributed this picture at her university, amongst her colleagues, and told them it was me in the picture.
Now I don't mind that it was a man in a kilt. The thing that causes raised eyebrows is that the camera view is from south to north and that the picture faithfully proves the old saying that there is nothing else worn under that kilt.
Yes, it is a nudie.
A few days ago I got a card signed by all her mates, with various comments ranging from demure compliments to some very lightly veiled offers and observations. To make matters worse, a photograph accompanied this card, showing four of the young ladies standing together in their uniforms. They are quite pretty. Actually let me be frank, they are hot...there, I said it. I am not going to post that picture here because I am going to visit my folks later this year in Colorado and I will probably meet some of my sisters pals while I am there. I don't want any further speculation on this side of the waters and on the other ;)
Who knows what sort of misadventure and high jinks could follow as a result of this prank...
That was my experience for 14.02.2007
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Okay, so your sis shows round a pic of a chap doing a Britney in a kilt to her nursing colleagues who happen to be hot...
You sir, are a complete scoundrel of the highest order. I suggest that in order to mitigate your scoundrel-ness you recruit a select band of fellow a.orgers to accompany you on this trip and ensure that said ladies with a length deprivation issue aren't disappointed.
I'm free during June/July/August etc.
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hehe
You are right, my friend.
Besides, based on what I know about nurses, four of them is definitely too many...even I can't tame that many :-P
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What? No ode to Blobrana? Where are your manners.
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X-ray wrote:
hehe
You are right, my friend.
Besides, based on what I know about nurses, four of them is definitely too many...even I can't tame that many :-P
Yeah, I spent many an evening frequenting the local nurses quarters in my home town when I was in my early 20s (my mate was a student nurse) so I've first hand experience of just how much taming they require.
However, it would be bloody great to find out just how many might be tamed in one sitting.
In the words of Woody Allen:
"The act of sex between two people is a wonderful thing. Between five it's totally awesome".
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"...What? No ode to Blobrana? Where are your manners..."
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Well, sir, I appreciate the sentiment, but that wee bairn has had more than enough attention from me.
I don't know how many odes I dropped on her, but it was definitely more than anyone else ever got (not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing).
It was all just playful teasing mainly, but she did have the opportunity to get a set of handlebars out of me with no strings attached but didn't take me up on that.
No more odes to Blobzie, I am officially on strike!
I have curbed my benevolence (in general) lately ;-)
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"...However, it would be bloody great to find out just how many might be tamed in one sitting..."
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Well, sir, I must advise you that if the nurses in question are anything like the ones I have seen and worked with, they are likely to bang like an out-house door in the wind.
If you want to take on four of them, you might well have to take out insurance, because you're gonna be like a pinball that hasn't missed the flipper for an hour or so :lol:
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X-ray wrote:
"...However, it would be bloody great to find out just how many might be tamed in one sitting..."
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Well, sir, I must advise you that if the nurses in question are anything like the ones I have seen and worked with, they are likely to bang like an out-house door in the wind.
If you want to take on four of them, you might well have to take out insurance, because you're gonna be like a pinball that hasn't missed the flipper for an hour or so :lol:
:-D I can second that, Dated a Nurse on and off for 10 years....... Oh my Back :-D
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I can third, fourth and fifth it... Ahem. :crazy:
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Valentine's Day...Bah humbug!!! :-P
For the record, I actually spent some time with a nursing student during my university days and I must say, thinking back, she was bloody dull, oh well, can't win 'em all I suppose :lol:
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Meh, we never do anything for valentine's day. We're not that soppy :-P
In saying that, this is probably the first time I've had a valentines day prezzie from Sioux...
She's got a bad cold and has lost her voice :-P
Does a great impression of a frog just now too :lol:
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So it looks like so far, no Amiga gents bought Valentine's goodies.
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Nope, have studiously abstained for many years.
My current girlfriend was unaware of my disdain for this "celebration" but has now realised that Iwas not joking when I said I "don't do valentines".
Besides, I'm plenty romantic the rest of year.
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X-ray wrote:
So it looks like so far, no Amiga gents bought Valentine's goodies.
Oh no, I got caught again this year (sent the missus some Roses at work) but it doesn't mean I have to like it ;-)
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I must say, one thing I don't do is flowers, Valentine's or no. I'm much more likely to do the chocolates and jewelry thing.
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If I gave Sioux flowers she'd chuck me out the house for making her hay fever worse :lol:
Actually.... not a bad idea that :-D
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:-o
Does she read this forum? Maybe you get some spanks for talking like that!
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Nah, she doesn't read this site unless there's something I point out to her ;-)
We're always slagging each other off anyways... and this isn't anywhere near the worst we've said to each other :-D
--edit--
In fact, she's going on a scuba diving holiday in Egypt in a few months. We've been saying that I'm going to be the happiest bloke on the planet when she's away :-D
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It sounds like you have a Mr and Mrs Smith thing going on there :-P
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The worst thing about valentines day is that the very next day I'm a year older....
I have now (well, yesterday) hit the unenviable age of
int age = (1<<5);
:-(
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X-ray wrote:
I must say, one thing I don't do is flowers, Valentine's or no. I'm much more likely to do the chocolates and jewelry thing.
To quote (or at least paraphrase, it was some time ago) KennyR:
"I've never understood what is remotely romantic about sending someone the amputated, slowly dying genetalia of plants."
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Only women know why...
By the way, Happy Birthday, and remember you have outlasted many a Betamax recorder, so don't feel down ;-)
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Happy birthday Karlos...
In the meantime, I sincerely hope that our gifts of roses/teddy bears/handlebars had the desired effect on the knicker elastic of our respective concubines.
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:lol:
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Cheers gents.
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@Karlos
[color=ff0000]Happy Birthday!!![/color][/b]
Ya old bugger :lol:
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If I get any older, I'll be farting dust.
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And you just got older again! And again, and again!
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Karlos wrote:
If I get any older, I'll be farting dust.
And I was just going to post "Happy birthday ya auld fart" :-P
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odin:
"And you just got older again! And again, and again!"
I bet that makes him feel much better!
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PMC:
"In the meantime, I sincerely hope that our gifts of roses/teddy bears/handlebars had the desired effect on the knicker elastic of our respective concubines."
Handlebars? I cant see that working so well. Although I might have been happy at the guesture. I didnt receive anything for Valentines Day :-(
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Karlos, channelling KennyR, wrote:
"I've never understood what is remotely romantic about sending someone the amputated, slowly dying genetalia of plants."
There was a boy who could have done with a little more sunshine in his life. :-)
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@Mel_zoom
A certain lady here is a fan of mountain biking - and a certain gent offered her a set of handlebars as a valentines gift.
I think she accepted on the proviso that they were covered in chocolate.
Actually, thinking about it I might myself be persuaded to put out if a lady offered me a set of handlebars for my MTB... Although I'd need to see a photo of the bars first.
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haha
He wants to see the handlebars first, loooooooooool !!
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Yeah, full works for a set of Easton CNT monkeylites, heavy petting for a pair of Answer ProTapers, but if it's Truvativ or EA 30s then we're looking at a peck on the cheek I'm afraid.
A guy has his standards...
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PMC wrote:
@Mel_zoom
A certain lady here is a fan of mountain biking - and a certain gent offered her a set of handlebars as a valentines gift.
I think she accepted on the proviso that they were covered in chocolate.
Glad you cleared that up ...
Or one could get the wrong set of handlebars ...
(http://www.magicmakers.com/retail/beards/handlebar.jpg)
:-P
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X-ray wrote:
you have outlasted many a Betamax recorder
not mine ;-)
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karlos....
[color=800000]Yo KARLOS !!![/color][/b]
You're being challenged, my lad. It's you vs Mick's Betamax. :-P